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Should you consider your child’s wants during divorce mediation?

On Behalf of | Dec 10, 2024 | Legal Custody |

Divorce mediation often focuses on creating a parenting plan that meets the best interests of the child. Virginia family courts encourage parents to consider their child’s wants, but it is equally important to balance these desires with the child’s overall well-being and long-term needs. 

Understanding how to incorporate a child’s preferences into mediation can help you create a more effective parenting plan.

Virginia’s approach to child custody

Virginia courts prioritize the best interests of the child when determining custody arrangements. Relevant factors include the child’s age, health and emotional needs. While it is common to take a child’s preferences into account, this is usually more applicable for older children who can express thoughtful and reasonable opinions. Mediation provides an opportunity to discuss these preferences without the formal constraints of a courtroom.

Weighing a child’s preferences

A child’s wishes should not always dictate every aspect of a custody agreement. For instance, a young child may express a desire to live with one parent simply because of a perceived leniency or fun activities in that household. In mediation, parents can discuss the child’s preferences and consider whether they align with their developmental needs and stability. Input from teenagers may hold more weight because they have a greater understanding of family dynamics.

Ensuring a child’s well-being

Listening to a child’s wishes can strengthen the parent-child relationship, but parents must ensure that these discussions do not place undue stress on the child. Mediation can help parents agree on how much to involve the child in decision-making and ensure the process feels supportive rather than overwhelming. The parents should present a united front to avoid burdening the child with adult concerns.

While it is important to listen to a child’s voice, mediation should focus on creating a practical parenting plan. Parents should strive to make decisions that foster their child’s long-term happiness rather than solely reacting to short-term preferences. By approaching mediation with this balance in mind, families can create agreements that serve everyone’s best interests.

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