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Putting kids first following a divorce

When two Virginia parents file for divorce, it can be very easy to allow emotions and self-concern to trump the needs of the children involved, especially if the divorce process becomes messy. However, there are ways parents can carve out an amicable relationship so that the kids can have a stable and meaningful relationship with both of them.

Divorcing parents can work on regaining or keeping trust. For example, if one parent brings the kids back late or has to make a sudden schedule change, it is better for both the other parent and the children to assume that it was for a good reason instead of due to laziness or irresponsibility. This tactic only works as long as both parents are committed and show no reason for the other person to believe that he or she is acting carelessly on purpose.

Additionally, parents must put their children first following a divorce. To prevent problems from occurring, parents should plan to have everything in writing so there is very little wiggle room. Parents should not vent about their ex-partner to their kids. In fact, they should never use their children as messengers and should avoid talking about their ex-partner in a negative way to their children.

Even an uncontested divorce can still cause a tension between parents that the children may pick up on. A family law attorney may assist with working out a parenting plan that fully outlines what is expected of each parent. Not only can this prevent some of the tension, but both the kids and the parents know exactly what to expect. If the other parent cannot properly care for the children, an attorney may help someone seek sole legal and physical custody. A lawyer may even take steps to make sure the other parent is required to have supervised visitation.

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